Well I'm back like a bad case of the "everybody clap your hands" ***CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP***

After a glorious donation by Nike the Heise twins afforded me a flight over from Sheffield for the weekend. I'll be making it a long week. I hear it's college Spring Break in the states and I've got pints to drink and bosoms to sign. Before I get to the religious sanctuary that is Panama City Beach I decided to catch some of the action at THE CAGE (scary voice)!

Periodically I'll toss out some updates here and there as I tend to do. As the night wears on and my 5th gets lower and lower I may give my thoughts on the EPL, life, politics, who knows at this point. STICK AROUND!

Right now we have Lexington and Spring Valley knotted up at 0-0. Even game so far.

Like a hobo in Kentucky and Tennessee tonight...you better stay tuned!

IT'S 1-0 LEXINGTON!

#23 PUTS THE BALL IN THE OLD ONION BAG!!!!

Half time here at the Cage and our score is 1-0 Lexington.

They say it's 5 o'clock somewhere? Where do I store my cooler?

3 Minutes into the second half and Lexington nets again! Pick it out fisherman! #23 with a brace and the ball trickles into the back of the net!

2-0 33 minutes played

3-0 Lexington in a rout now. This Spring Valley side has seen better days than today.

Full time and Lexington bags the 3 points! Up next is Ridge View vs Cardinal Newman

First half is scoreless between CN and RV

1-0 CN 48th minute! WYATT MILLARD~!!!!

1-1 in the 49th as RV answers. GAME ON

2-1 CN as WYATT STRIKES AGAIN! WHAT A DEBUT BY THE YOUNG STARLET

UNBELIEVABLE....Ridge View scores on the last kick of the game to make it 2-2. Penalties surely

RV advances after 10 rounds of JV penalty kicks...which artery is the best to have severed?

Blywood is off and running on White Knoll. It's already 1-0 for the BENGALS...GRRRRRR

6th minute

HOLD ON TO YOUR TRAILERS AND PARK YOUR TRACTORS!! 1-1 WE GOT A GAME!!!

WK Equalizes on 27 minutes

It's deer hunting season all over again as WK slotted another one home on 40 minutes. Take off that camo and kiss your sister we've got good one brewing here at the Cage.

And just like that Blythewood strikes back! A free kick sails into the net! Blyethwood has been emancipated here in the 45th minute.

F my life...more pelanties.

There'll be burnin couches on HWY 6 tonight. WK wins in penalties.

Count your blessings and celebrate tonight. There's tornadoes headed this way tomorrow.

Last match is underway and it's 1-0 BC over Hammond in the 12th minute