If you can't recognize when you are talking trash, why do you think that you can recognize it in others? We must have different definitions of the term. For clarification, my version definitely includes sideways remarks like "I would be ashamed," and "calling it as many see it." While they are a less raunchy version than you probably see on the field (by many teams) the desired goal is the same, invoke a reaction through a negative comment. As for the referenced foul, it was my understanding that both players got ejected. I'm sure the South Aiken player was innocent, simply a victim.
As far as I'm concerned trash talking, to an extent, is acceptable in athletics. It is the competitive mentality verbalized. Violence is not. If the foul was truly as bad as you say the players involved should and will be punished.
Don't demonize players for talking the talk and then following through. Sticks and stones right?