SC Soccer Forums SCSoccer.com Forums Club Soccer & ODP How to avoid coach/parent/player bad actions on the field

Since everyone talks about a constructive topic on this subject, and nobody has started one yet, I decided to start a new thread. What do you all think would be an effective way to prevent what was "alleged" to have happened at a certain game where a player was "allegedly" struck? While we are on the subject, how can you keep the parents from getting out of hand at games? It has been my experience that a lot of parents are getting to the point of being very belligerant and threatening at times. I sometimes just go to watch club games where I live to watch good games, and to see how the other refs are reffing. Some of these parents are getting out of hand. What I noticed though was that most teams that had parents that were out of hand had coaches that were complete jerks. How can we prevent this from happpening?

Someone e-mail Dr. Phil.. he'll know what to do.

Well, I have observed that some coaches and parents come to games not so much to play the game as to see how obnoxious and intimidating they can be be, especially towards the ref. I guess they feel like they paid their $500 bucks and they have a right to make any comments without any rebuke or penalty. No matter what sport it is, it is of course natural to pull for your respective team to win. Yet, when calls don't go your way every time or your child is fouled or when your team plays bad, you as a parent, can't blame it on the coach who may have not prepared the team well enough or did not practice the team enough, and you certainly don't want to blame your perfect children for not being ready to play or because they missed several practices. So who else is there to take out your frustrations on? The refs of course!! But, to address the issue proposed by soccerboy........I think it has to come from the DOC and the club officials what will be the expected conduct for parents, players and coaches. You can have several responsible parents appointed as monitors of conduct on the sidelines. It is not an easy job, but it must be done. Also, there should be more emphasis and direction from SCYSA regarding the seriousness of some of these recent incidents. I am not aware of the specific guidelines from SCYSA concerning conduct and any penalties for club infractions. Anyone have any info on the specific guidelines?

LE dudeman,
Think hard before you answer this question -
Have you ever made a constructive comment in your entire life?

I think the first thing that must happen is for the coach to speak to the parents pre-season and let them know his expectations. He/She needs to let them know that he is the coach and he will be the one to discuss "incorrect" calls with the refs and it's not up to the parents to call the Refs out. He also needs to remind parents that if their behavior is obscene or obnoxious that he reserves the right to have them removed from the field and their child removed from the team no matter how good they are. I have coached in the past and I don't care if the kid is the best player on the field, if you have to deal with an obnoxious parent it just isn't worth the trouble. Let the kid put some pressure on the parent to behave. I've seen it happen where a parent is irate over a call and the kid runs down the sideline and says, "Just be quiet. It's over." That "embarrassed" the parent into shutting up.

LE Dudeman,
Benp lippen mentioned that all the parents were removed from a game last week, due to conduct and threats. This incident happened after the Aiken incident. NOW is the time to make constructive comments because it will not be a joke when some crazed, out of control parent or coach harms someone physically, i.e the hockey parent situation. This should be viewed proactively and not reactively.

First rule of business. Whatever happens at the lower level is being thought by the higher levels. So I guess to start we need to look at the different levels of positions within USYSA soccer.

Top down

1. USYSA
2. SCYSA
3. Club Board Members
4. Club DOC
5. Coaches
6. Team Manager and Refs
7. Parents
8. Players
9. Fans

I don't think USYSA is the problem.

SCYSA has talked to all the Coaches, Clubs, and Team Managers about toning it down or else they will lose their bonds. I do think there is a frustration with SCYSA in some of their decisions and for the most part very lacking communication skills. They tend to be more reactive to a problem then pro-active. This frustration could be being vented on the field since SCYSA does seem to give any other place to vent. For example, they annonce they are having a SCYSA meeting on Spet 10th in the "SCYSA Newspaper" which most people got on Sept 11th.

But not all clubs seem to have the problem. I have noticed in my years of watching the sport that if one team is a problem team then most likely a lot of the teams from that club are a problem. I blame this squarely on the club board of directors. The club hires the DOC and the DOC sets the tone for the coaches. The coaches then set the tone for the parents and the players will follow their coaches first and parents next.

Almost without fail if I hear a player mouthing off at the opposing parents or Ref, you will hear giggles from the sideline by that players parent and a coach that does nothing. I know for a fact that if a player mouths off on a Heather Fredrick team and she sees it, you better be ready to get your tail chewed because she can't sub you fast enough and won't be holding back. I have seen her make a girl cry because she was using foul language of the field.

I do think the coach has the most direct control of the game and is the most responsible for the actions of the parents and players but the coach is getting direction from his/her DOC and it turn the board of directors.

I will say this also. I believe a REF has a responisiblity to keep control of the game and everyone on the field. I have seen to many REFs that will let a game get out of control. SCYSA needs to train the REFs to call more obvious and tighter fouls. I have seen teams that count on a REF to not make calls and be able to bully their way through a game. Those same teams will lose when a REF calls a tight game and requires them to play soccer, which in the end is what is best for the sport and SC.

Now the question is how do you fix it. I thinking better training for the REFs on calling fouls. But for clubs, SCYSA needs to hit them in the pocket book. Start taking more bond checks each team posts and if a team loses its bond based on misconduct then take the club bond also. REFs should also send in a card to SCYSA rating the team behaviors between 1 and 10. If the team posts 3 bad ratings then pull the bond.

Thats it for now.

LE Dude, I was just providing a forum for those that have some good ideas to express them. I have no connection to anything that was expressed on the other thread besides having an opinion. I just think it would be interesting to see what some of the ideas might be to keep some of these situations from arising. There was a slight bit of sarcasm when I started the topic, but it should be interesting to see all the different ideas.

You may want to start here SCYSA code of Ethics

I am not sure many people read it.