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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 678
goal
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goal
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 678 |
Striker,
Each player is different, hopefully they learn something positive in defeat.
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 678
goal
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goal
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 678 |
Happyfeet,
A couple years ago coaches didn't watch SC teams at ODP because they never had much success on the field as a team. I'm sure SC had quality players at the time, but coaches were watching the states that won consistantly. As SC started winning more players started getting noticed.
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,659
world cup
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world cup
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,659 |
Sweet, When your phone rang a few times at Disney, I imagine someone on the other end asked "How did you do?", or "How did she do?", as opposed to "Did you win?". If you drew, or lost a close game....you could have explained to the caller how your team (or your daughter) played well, despite the fact that the final score may not have gone your way. This could be considered "a success"....even if you didn't win the match. The whole darn experience should have been a succes, even for happyfeet and his daughter (despite the fact that he wore her rear end out running her around the amusement parks!) 
Kids play sports because they find it fun. Eliminate the fun and soon you eliminate the kid.
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 678
goal
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goal
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 678 |
Hurst,
You got me thinking, your right, they did ask "how did she do?" probally 50% of the time, as opposed to "did she win?". But never how successfull was she or the team.
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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,429
hat-trick
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hat-trick
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,429 |
Quote:
You handle defeat by working harder/longer so next time you won't lose.
Either we're oversimplifying or it's that simple.
But you will lose.
In the real world you win games and lose games. You work hard and prepare hard and dream big and play big....and sometimes you still lose.
You never accept the loss but you must accept the concept of a loss. Its like asking a goalie to NEVER allow a goal, or a cornerback to never give up a touchdown pass. You prepare yourself for achieving perfection....but don't dwell on the miscues.
I have never been about winning, although I want and expect to win every game I've ever played or coached. But if we do our best and play with courage and passion, as far as I'm concerned the results will be what the results will be. The 2 or 3 most memorable games I've ever coached were losses.
Now, balance all of that with my definition of success for SC ODP this weekend. SC ODP will be successful this weekend if my son plays well and makes his team!!
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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,427
coach
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OP
coach
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,427 |
Big,
But if he plays well and still does not make the team? Would you still consider it a successful experience in your son's life? And would his loss (not making the team) make him a better person?
Last edited by 2004striker; 01/11/08 04:29 PM.
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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,427
coach
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OP
coach
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,427 |
Vince Lombardi once said that “Winning isn’t everything. It’s the only thing.” Unfortunately, children today are learning that success equates to winning and failure to losing.
I wonder if the respective members of this forum agree or disagree with this statement -
[We glorify winners with trophies and ignore, even vilify losers, but when winning becomes the only objective of youth sports, other very important values and objectives are lost or compromised.]
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,457
Hat-Trick
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Hat-Trick
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,457 |
To learn how to win you must first learn how to lose.
There are different ways to lose...
1- you stink, therefore you must work harder to get better
2- you played hard and got beat by better team. you work harder at getting better
3-you played hard and was "unlucky" to not win. you work hard er at getting better.
4- you played hard , are the better team and were "unlucky" to not win. you work hard er at getting better
all have the same requirement to turn a loss into a success... the problem is the definition of working harder. To each individual it will be different.
I can honestly say that you learn more about yourself, your team, and life by losing than by winning. This is why I believe it is so hard to win at anything CONSISTANTLY...
Someone once told me that in any game the opponent always gets to vote whether you win or lose.
So yes I believe that there can be succes in losing, just like there can be disappointment in winning. Except it does not hurt as much...
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 427
goal
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goal
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 427 |
If soccer is a team sport the individual player's work ethic is most likely different. Therefore, in the comments above it is not necessarily "you" that must work harder but the team. Obviously, the harder you work should improve the team as a whole.
Thanks to Mr. Emerson this is my definition of success:
"The definition of success--To laugh much; to win respect of intelligent persons and the affections of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give one's self; to leave the world a little better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition.; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm, and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived--this is to have succeeded."
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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,429
hat-trick
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hat-trick
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,429 |
Quote:
Big,
But if he plays well and still does not make the team? Would you still consider it a successful experience in your son's life? And would his loss (not making the team) make him a better person?
Probably not.
For him, this weekend is all about two things: playing well AND making the team. There really aren't any moral victories....its a pretty stark thing, yes or no. Make the team or not.
But also in fairness, I think situations like tryouts are different than team oriented competitions like club soccer or school soccer where it can be debatable about the value of lessons learned by not winning.
I don't see how not achieving a personal goal.....can make him a better person. He can become motivated to work harder to become a better soccer player, but if he was already highly motivated, what then?
Maybe he isn't good enough. Maybe he simply didn't play well. Maybe the chemistry wasn't right. Maybe he didn't play the right position.
Some things are cut and dried and some are not. If there's a moral lesson to be gained its....maybe life isn't always fair. And if there's a second lesson it's tomorrow is another day.
With that said......good luck to every young man and woman who has the guts to step out and compete against the best in their sport in the region this weekend!!! Play hard, play fast, have fun.
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