"Hey, this is Kyle. I'm 36 and single. Are you Asian?" - unknown

"Marcus is about to have to go unload" - Mr. Heise

"This ain't no elephant ride" - unknown

"#12, Osama Bin Laden" - unknown

"Looks like they trained hard in the off season because last year Farragut came in here and got beat like Rodney King." - unknown

I'll think of some more soon.