It has been a good discussion...and I'd like to reiterate that all of the responsibility for "controlling the game" shouldn't be placed solely on the officials. There's a fine art to officiating a game so that the players decide the outcome on the field, yet are held to good standards of sportsmanship and safety; of course it takes wisdom and experience to find that balance, and some are always going to be better than others, just like in any other activity. At the same time, coaches can do a lot to set the tone of the game for both their players and their parents, and in doing so can make the game much easier or much more difficult for the officials to manage. Fouls are going to happen in any competition due to the nature of the game, but teaching players the expectation of playing hard yet fairly can greatly reduce problems on the field, while teaching them to see how much they can get away with before getting caught can have the opposite effect.
Our tone on the sidelines also carries over onto the field and even to the parents' sideline...I know sometimes I get agitated and let things show that shouldn't, and I have to remind myself to take a step back to help defuse the problem rather than contribute to escalating it. It's difficult sometimes, especially when you feel like things are happening that shouldn't and you want to go to bat for your team--I got a little wound up this past weekend and wish I'd handled it better--but in trying to deal with problems we as coaches should think about the Hippocratic Oath all doctors take before dealing with physical ailments...
"First, do no harm."
