You understand, I hope, that in part, you're making my case. Coaches don't walk all over competent officials -- in part, because the officials won't take it, and in part because competent officials make fewer glaring errors. (And by the way, if the SCHSL had ANY credibility, it would aggressively discipline serial referee abusers and intimidators in the coaching ranks. We ALL know who they are.)
That said, I am amazed that you continue to put the officiating "problem" on parents and coaches, but not where it belongs, on the officials themselves, and those who train and certify them. Competent officials ignore parents, and defuse problem kids and coaches with proactive man management. People who are not temperamentally disposed to officiating have "rabbit ears," exacerbate coaching "problems," and throw card after card with no ultimate positive purpose.
You ask the question: How does a referee become competent? For one thing, he doesn't sit in the all-day, overpriced, whining sessions that currently pass for education and certification, then expect to be competent. (Just curious, how many prospective officials aren't certified in any given year? How many bad officials are disciplined/removed?).
Here are a few more suggestions:
1) Each "young" official should be assigned a mentor, who is available to talk/meet when needed. The mentor official should be paid $20/game more for assuming that added responsibility.
2) When a struggling official is identified as such by coaches and peers, he/she should be subject to constructive, unannounced reevaluation in a live match.
3) After the evaluation, he should be reevaluated at least once more in-season to see whether any improvement has been made.
4) Officials should be required to review game video more often. I bet they'd learn a lot, and in the process, garner some respect from coaches.
In conclusion, I would think that coaches, such as yourself, would be fighting to weed out problem coaches and officials. As the adults in the game, you folks are acting in loco parentis when my child is playing. I have the right -- maybe even the obligation -- to lobby on behalf of better officiating and (indirectly) player safety.
If that's by making an occasional direct remark from the sideline, so be it.
